Comments on: My Myopia, Or My Mother’s?

By: Nancy

Nancy — Fri, 15 Mar 2019 18:40:18 +0000

In reply to Eva. Eva, this is a great insight about your history. I've often thought that I saw/felt what was going on in my family when I was a child more clearly than my mother did, and I needed to blur it out since it was so painful. My world is so much larger now! And it is safe to see whatever I want to see. Good for you for your sensitivity, Eva, and for your clarity. <3

By: Eva

Eva — Fri, 15 Mar 2019 17:35:59 +0000

None of my parents had any vision problems, but they both had and have narcissistic personality disorder. Back there they didn’t want their children to have their own point of view on life. They wanted us nearsighted so they could project their perception on their daughters. While my blood mother was pregnant with my youngest sister, my parents were planing to move to another town. This distracted them from imposing limits and restriction on her. And she is the only one with good vision.

By: Nancy L. Neff

Nancy L. Neff — Tue, 19 Apr 2016 14:21:00 +0000

In reply to Таня Двойникова. It's totally possible to improve your vision, and yes, we are going against the tide by doing so. If you feel that you abused your eyes, it's time to start being kind to them now. And you will learn so much about yourself! See yourself as a healthy person too. (smile)

By: Таня Двойникова

Таня Двойникова — Tue, 19 Apr 2016 07:55:00 +0000

Hm… It’s really interesting. My dad has -9 and my mom has normal vision. It always seemed that I inhereted my dad’s myopia (I stopped at -8 on the right eye and -7,5 on the left), and my younger brother has normal vision like mom. But I was exposed to the computer much later than he (I already had like -5 before I knew what the internet was!). Yes, he had that “farsightedness cushion” when he was born, and I hadn’t… but maybe that’s it? I feel that I abused my eyes for such a long time partly because of this “it’s hereditary and you can do nothing about it” mindset. Funnily enough, I knew about Bates method since childhood (it seems like here in Russia doctors aren’t as in denial about it as in some other countries), but never even tried it, I thought it’s something for “healthy people” (those who wear glasses with their -1).

By: Nancy L. Neff

Nancy L. Neff — Fri, 21 Aug 2015 00:03:00 +0000

In reply to AlkalineWater7. Yes, I have noticed a more accepting mindset in myself when my vision is clearer. I'm still looking for the Big Meaning behind why I had poor vision for most of my life. It's taught me a lot, that's for sure.

By: AlkalineWater7

AlkalineWater7 — Thu, 20 Aug 2015 22:51:00 +0000

In reply to Nancy L. Neff. Thanks for the response. I have been contemplating many things lately. I put this stuff out there to help others; maybe they have similar situations I have had. It's still a journey for me. I'm learning new things everyday. But one approach I think worthwhile to take is a Buddhistic approach; an approach that views life as a collection of impermanent experiences that are neither good or bad. This does make sense. Every time I do get improved vision by central fixation, my view of the world becomes neutral, and impartial. Perhaps there is a purpose to why I got poor eyesight. Maybe it's a journey that is actually hinted at dealing with and processing strain and discomfort within the body.

By: Nancy L. Neff

Nancy L. Neff — Thu, 20 Aug 2015 22:22:00 +0000

In reply to AlkalineWater7.

Thanks — one of the best things you can say to me as a writer is that my words made you think! As a fetus or small child, Mom is the entire world. If she is depressed, it’s total. We don’t have the perspective to see that we can be other than she is. She is our survival, and if she’s not OK, we’re not OK either.

As I’ve said to you before, good for you for your high level of awareness. Knowing you have choices will keep you seeking the ones right for you. Keep up the good work!

By: AlkalineWater7

AlkalineWater7 — Thu, 20 Aug 2015 20:51:00 +0000

This does rather relate to me. Neither of my parents are severely myopic. My mother is farsighted, and my dad goes most of the time without glasses. He has no restrictions on his license, so his vision must be around 20/40 or so. Pretty good considering that they’re pretty old. Here’s what I think the situation is for me. While I was still in my mother’s stomach, she migrated to the U.S. She claimed that while she was pregnant with me, she went through a lot of depression and worry accompanied with lots of crying. It appeared that she wanted to go back to her home country. Perhaps the stress of my mother experiencing a strange, unfamiliar environment transferred to me? I’m not sure about this but this would make a lot of sense as to why I’m easily threatened out in public, and prone to a strained way of interacting with the world. If I ever have children in the future, I would make sure that the mother of the child is in a comfortable, familiar environment. That way, the trans-generational cycle of stress imposed upon the child may be lessened. Come to think of it, I was rather social earlier on in life. Perhaps the trans-generational stress theory doesn’t hold water. When I was a toddler, I enjoyed myself quite a bit. I started becoming myopic at the age of 8. Strangely, this is the time that my mother started working, and I was left all alone at the house. There are many factors at play. I’m still trying to reveal why I feel uncomfortable in public, and social situations and work on reversing it. Nevertheless, thanks for the article. It made me reflect upon my life.