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+--- Thread: Definitely a difference in personality. (/showthread.php?tid=1239)
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Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - denny58stout - 01-26-2010
Fantastic!! I'm Denny Stout ..I'm new here and I Just want to share this quote as my first post here...
"The less you can live on, the more chance your idea will succeed. This is true even after youâve 'made it.'.
Make it a Great day people...
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - spydermann - 03-30-2010
Definitely a difference in personality!
You guys say myopic people are introverted, needing to please others, daydreamers of being admired, hard on themselves, worriers of what others think...
I checked yes next to each personality trait!
I feel like something must've happened that made me want to escape from seeing and facing life, and I retreated behind a protective blur. I've got an astigmatism and I thought that was cool that in flowerpower's book that meant a person is changing themselves to please someone else...that is right on the dot for my usual personality...
BUT!!
I've gone almost a year now without any crutches, and i must say i feel sooooo much more in tune with myself than before. More at peace with myself and connected with friends and life...just more comfortable in my skin, basically. this whole vision journey we're all on is really paying off. Still a little further to go..
flowerpower Wrote:Dave is pointing not to let these thoughts to control you. And that would be a goal. But then how do you do it. You know that if you tell yourself I must not think those negative thoughts it's still not easy to stop.
I agree, telling yourself to just "stop thinking negative" sometimes has a reverse effect... its like trying to get rid of a weed by hacking at the leaves instead of the root...
I guess everyone's self-criticism is different and is rooted in different things...relationships, jobs, sports, sometimes everything. So for me i've found that instead of hushing -- listening to my negative and critical thoughts was the first step. Listen to them and try to think where it originated. And who does it sound like? I noticed many times it sounded just like my Mom... and after doing some journal writing and self reflection on it I was a lot less affected by the thoughts, since i finally understood and realized that most of it was just garbage. People told me that "negative thoughts arent true"...but I think you have to dig into yourself and find out for yourself.
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - Nancy - 03-31-2010
Spyderman,
I agree challenging those negative thoughts is essential, and journaling is a great tool. I think practicing positive thoughts, even if you don't believe them at first, is important too, because if you keep doing it eventually they become true.
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - David - 03-31-2010
I think it's useful to think of thoughts by considering whether they exist without conflict between each other and accurately represent you and where you are right now in the moment in terms of what you think you know and what you are actually doing. A positive thought that is in conflict with other thoughts or beliefs is no better than a negative one in the layers of confusion and dissolution of self-awareness it perpetuates. Challenging positive thoughts is as important as challenging negative ones. Conversely, negative thoughts can be true too, and ignoring them would be like putting blinders on. There is a lot of information and misinformation available about improving vision, and even in just keeping with the Bates method it can be confusing trying to reconcile what is supposed to happen, what actually does happen, what it means, and what you're supposed to do or not do. So the mess has to be approached with as much self-honesty as possible so as to recognize it as a mess and begin to work piece by piece on identifying what you're working with.
Dave
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - Nancy - 04-01-2010
Dave, I agree -- thanks for the clarification. I didn't mean to imply that someone should believe they have perfect vision if they've been wearing strong glasses for years. What I had in mind was the overly negative "I can't see a thing!" or "I can't do anything right", etc. which should be challenged and something softer (and more accurate) substituted.
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - spydermann - 04-07-2010
yes it does take some thinking AND feeling to guide towards what brings the best understanding.
I see what you're saying Dave to guide thoughts towards what is realistic and relative to yourself and your current position (Instead of a 25 year glasses-wearer saying (or hopelessly shouting): "I have perfect vision! I can see clearly!", it would be better to recognize "I've had bad vision habits for 25 years, but with a little practice and persistence, I can restore clarity in no time") and i see what you mean too Nancy on replacing the pessimistic self criticism with a more positive balanced view. (From: "I cant see a thing!" to "Right now it's hard to see, but if I relax, blink, and breathe it might come in clear..")
One belief i'm struggling with is what this thread states about personality- I feel like if i'm to ever see clearly, I'm going to need to totally renovate my self doubting and denying personality into an assertive and confident one... and while this may be a true and positive statement for some, for me I look at how far I am from that confident way of being and i end up more discouraged than motivated... so this blurry thought is a tough one for me to see clearly
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - Summon-Pretty-Peace - 04-07-2010
I just have to say-- I love your signature, Spydermann!
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - Nancy - 04-08-2010
Spyderman,
You said
Quote:I feel like if i'm to ever see clearly, I'm going to need to totally renovate my self doubting and denying personality into an assertive and confident one...Well, how about baby steps? Just like I notice and praise myself for seeing something clearly which used to be blurry, I also celebrate when I say hello to someone I pass instead of averting my gaze. For a recovering introvert who still usually prefers solitude to company, this is a big deal! I know I have to reach out socially more just like I have to reach out visually more (see far!), but I'm also aware that this won't happen in one giant leap.
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - Summon-Pretty-Peace - 04-08-2010
Nancy Wrote:For a recovering introvert who still usually prefers solitude to company, this is a big deal! I know I have to reach out socially more just like I have to reach out visually more (see far!), but I'm also aware that this won't happen in one giant leap.I've read that there is a difference between being introverted and being inconfident or shy. You could have a natural inclination towards solitary activities and a preference for spending time with your closest friends over meeting new people, without actually having a fear of others. That's what I'm aiming for
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - spydermann - 04-12-2010
I agree, healthy introversion is something i'm aiming to see the good in also. I still feel quite unconfident and fearful of others but its usually when i'm trying to be ultra outgoing or overly pleasing...but like you said Nancy, just baby steps. Like sometimes for me NOT saying Hello to someone I pass is a big accomplishment for me because I'm proud I was able to overcome that pleaser obligation which criticizes me for not being the worlds friendliest person. That's just on some occasions.... Cute introverted girls I pass in the halls though...that's a rough one where a little extroversion, tho uncomfortable, might be needed..
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - Nancy - 04-13-2010
OK, instead of looking away or down, if it were me I'd try a quick glance at her face and a shy smile, and she might pick up on that. Don't try for a booming enthusiastic "Hello!" or you'll probably scare her!
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - sean - 04-13-2010
Spyderman
"cute introverted girls" - nah mate, if you are an introvert then it's cute extravert girls you should be smiling at. I have read it and confirmed by experience that all couples are made up of one of each!
Good points made here by posters about introverts coming out of their shell, even if it's just to make the point that they don't have to.
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - spydermann - 04-14-2010
right on you guys good advice...
Introversion...
..the thing that is rough about the extraverted gals is that they're friendly with me...and also lots of other boys...so the insecurity kicks in pretty quick
Summon-Pretty-Peace Wrote:I've read that there is a difference between being introverted and being inconfident or shy.
i think i'm all three, which can be quite a pickle at times...
Re: Definitely a difference in personality. - DaniFixe - 05-02-2010
First,nice topic. Second,i have read your posts and i agree with them. I have myopia -3.25 each eyes and a little of astigmatism. I'm very negative to myself,think more about the other than on me. My music style is depressive and noisy music and i have bad posture. I have too many difficult with concentration and controling stress. I started now neuropsychology sessions to control better my mind and i'm practicing now pilates' sport to correct my posture.
But,when i'm doing the exercises i feel sometimes itches over my body and,of course,some difficult to concentrate. And as I am in the beginning of trainning,is normal to see no improvement,but that makes me feel this doesn't work. My mind wants fast result...
Which exercises is better to relax mind and body ? I do palming,but after a while i became boring...