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+--- Thread: I am desperate (/showthread.php?tid=2659)
I am desperate - misterfun - 12-25-2013
Hello its me again.... first of all i'd like to say that everything i type is true because some people (that i won't name) thought it was fake...... i have more important things to do in life...
So: I am 15 and i have -2,5 (it was -1,5 in august) i sometimes do plaming for 2 minutes in the morning right after I awake and also 2 minutes of sunning in the evening (with a lamp). I don't see any improvements (my vision has even gone worse) I don't understand...
I use a lot the computer (without glasses) and I watch tv a lot too (i am forced to put on my glasses because i cannot see anything) is it a good idea, and will it help?
I cannot see the blackboard at school, i don't want to put on my glasses because i look like a nerd, i cannot see what the teacher writes so i take pictures (with my phone) and i copy them in my books the evening. I know it is not reasonable but i dont really want to look like a stupid idiot nerd
When I talk about the bates method to my family they laugh and then they shout at me because they think its an excuse to not put on my glasses. They don't care about me but force me to wear those ridiculous glasses...
I plan to buy contact lenses because i don't think my vision will improve with the bates method, im desperate.
yep, i think i told you everything now, you can see how miserable i am and i repeat it i am not a fake person so please i want true answers and not jokes or whatever...
thank you bye
RE: I am desperate - toki-sama - 12-25-2013
(12-25-2013, 05:09 PM)misterfun Wrote: Hello its me again.... first of all i'd like to say that everything i type is true because some people (that i won't name) thought it was fake...... i have more important things to do in life...
So: I am 15 and i have -2,5 (it was -1,5 in august) i sometimes do plaming for 2 minutes in the morning right after I awake and also 2 minutes of sunning in the evening (with a lamp). I don't see any improvements (my vision has even gone worse) I don't understand...
I use a lot the computer (without glasses) and I watch tv a lot too (i am forced to put on my glasses because i cannot see anything) is it a good idea, and will it help?
I cannot see the blackboard at school, i don't want to put on my glasses because i look like a nerd, i cannot see what the teacher writes so i take pictures (with my phone) and i copy them in my books the evening. I know it is not reasonable but i dont really want to look like a stupid idiot nerd
When I talk about the bates method to my family they laugh and then they shout at me because they think its an excuse to not put on my glasses. They don't care about me but force me to wear those ridiculous glasses...
I plan to buy contact lenses because i don't think my vision will improve with the bates method, im desperate.
yep, i think i told you everything now, you can see how miserable i am and i repeat it i am not a fake person so please i want true answers and not jokes or whatever...
thank you bye
From my experience the bates method takes a lot of work. I think very few people here have actually achieved 20/20, despite the hundreds of posts and articles. Not saying it's impossible, but it might take a considerable amount of time and effort and experimentation. Conversely, I suppose you could also achieve success rather quickly depending on the cause of your poor vision.
If you're afraid of looking like a dork, just get a pair of Wayfarer glasses. They're pretty hip these days. Get transitional lenses so they'll turn into sunglasses outside and you'll look like a bad ass. Or go for contacts.
At any rate, consider taking a break and going back to Bates during summer vacation. The stress from not being able to see at school might be detrimental to your progress.
RE: I am desperate - Daniel - 12-26-2013
(12-25-2013, 10:02 PM)toki-sama Wrote: At any rate, consider taking a break and going back to Bates during summer vacation. The stress from not being able to see at school might be detrimental to your progress.
But during summer vacation you might want to get a job, learn to drive, etc. And your eyesight might be even worse by then. For a mid-teen at -2.5 and declining, it's probably now or never.
Take a look at this. It's by a behavioral optometrist, and seems straightforward and very instructive.
RE: I am desperate - toki-sama - 12-27-2013
Quote:But during summer vacation you might want to get a job, learn to drive, etc. And your eyesight might be even worse by then. For a mid-teen at -2.5 and declining, it's probably now or never.
True. Perhaps I should have mentioned something on prevention. I just think it'll be hard to get around spending around 7 hours in a closed environment where you NEED to see at a distance.
Unfortunately the bates method is so simple that it can be summed up in a few sentences, but also so complex that it can be written about in dozens of books and hundreds of forum posts. Throw on top of this school, homework, socializing, and responsibilities and it might be a little difficult to consistently practice.
Perhaps reduced prescription glasses (only worn when needed), pinhole glasses for computer use, and practicing the simpler aspects of the bates method might result in some progress/prevention until summer vacation is in effect.
Quote:Take a look at this. It's by a behavioral optometrist, and seems straightforward and very instructive.
Great document!
RE: I am desperate - Daniel - 12-27-2013
(12-27-2013, 12:59 PM)toki-sama Wrote: I just think it'll be hard to get around spending around 7 hours in a closed environment where you NEED to see at a distance.
Unfortunately the bates method is so simple that it can be summed up in a few sentences, but also so complex that it can be written about in dozens of books and hundreds of forum posts. Throw on top of this school, homework, socializing, and responsibilities and it might be a little difficult to consistently practice.
This is why I've suggested semi-seriously that people consider leaving school. If you could do home education, that would at least eliminate the socializing and needing to see at a distance.
(12-27-2013, 12:59 PM)toki-sama Wrote: Perhaps reduced prescription glasses (only worn when needed), pinhole glasses for computer use, and practicing the simpler aspects of the bates method might result in some progress/prevention until summer vacation is in effect.
It sounds like misterfun probably already has (what are now) reduced prescription glasses. Unfortunately, a reduced prescription could itself cause strain if you end up squinting to see something better.
Pinhole glasses probably wouldn't go over well in school. Anyway, at -2.5 you can probably still use a computer unaided.
RE: I am desperate - toki-sama - 12-28-2013
Quote:This is why I've suggested semi-seriously that people consider leaving school. If you could do home education, that would at least eliminate the socializing and needing to see at a distance.
Based on what misterfun has said, doesn't seem like his family would support such a decision
Quote:It sounds like misterfun probably already has (what are now) reduced prescription glasses. Unfortunately, a reduced prescription could itself cause strain if you end up squinting to see something better.
Pinhole glasses probably wouldn't go over well in school. Anyway, at -2.5 you can probably still use a computer unaided.
Reduced prescription could at least someone to the point where they can see the blackboard without disrupting the eyes as much as a full prescription. I was suggesting pinholes for computer work at home
At anyrate, at this point I'm pretty sure misterfun is some variation of a troll.
In this post he say's he's 15 and in another he say's he's 14, and in another 17
His story sounds utterly ridiculous
His account says he's only spent 37 seconds online
He hasn't responded to private messages
He suddenly drops off of threads (like this) never to be heard from again
Why would someone troll a vision improvement forum? No idea
RE: I am desperate - Daniel - 12-28-2013
I would question whether the "37 seconds" is even possible in light of his total posts. Maybe that's a technical issue?
Going from 14 to 15 is very natural, but yes, he did originally say he was 17. People often give false ages online, for different reasons.
Beyond that, I'm not sure why his story sounds "utterly ridiculous".
RE: I am desperate - toki-sama - 12-28-2013
(12-28-2013, 02:30 PM)Daniel Wrote: I would question whether the "37 seconds" is even possible in light of his total posts. Maybe that's a technical issue?
Going from 14 to 15 is very natural, but yes, he did originally say he was 17. People often give false ages online, for different reasons.
Beyond that, I'm not sure why his story sounds "utterly ridiculous".
I don't want to quote everything he's said, but the general theme is "My life completely sucks because I can't see, but I don't want to wear glasses because it'll make me look like a nerd"
He seems to be far more concerned with how he looks rather then preventing/reducing myopia, which is fine, but taking everything else into consideration, his story becomes questionable. Seems like he's 90% concerned with looks and 10% with the benefits of natural vision improvement, so why not just get glasses (or better yet, contacts) and enjoy school? Practicing the bates method routinely would surely prevent further deterioration while he focuses on school and his social life.
I think bates method might not be appropriate for this guy at the moment. Can you imagine a trucker trying to fit bates into his on-season?
Anyways, I really hope he isn't a troll since we've spent to much time in this thread. Hope the next post comes from misterfun himself. Like Moulder, I want to believe
RE: I am desperate - jamest - 12-29-2013
If the op is for real, I would say do not try the bates method. It is not proven to work and I think it is terrible advice from Daniel to drop out of school. He will lose his social network and career prospects.
RE: I am desperate - Daniel - 12-29-2013
(12-29-2013, 01:07 PM)jamest Wrote: If the op is for real, I would say do not try the bates method. It is not proven to work and I think it is terrible advice from Daniel to drop out of school. He will lose his social network and career prospects.
Actually, I suggested home education, which actually works out quite well for some people.
This thread really goes to show that myopia needs to be nipped in the bud. If it progresses even moderately, there could be a lot of practical barriers to improvement. Perhaps this is why the Bates method is not "proven"; it's too hard to test.
RE: I am desperate - jamest - 01-12-2014
(12-29-2013, 05:22 PM)Daniel Wrote:(12-29-2013, 01:07 PM)jamest Wrote: If the op is for real, I would say do not try the bates method. It is not proven to work and I think it is terrible advice from Daniel to drop out of school. He will lose his social network and career prospects.
Actually, I suggested home education, which actually works out quite well for some people.
This thread really goes to show that myopia needs to be nipped in the bud. If it progresses even moderately, there could be a lot of practical barriers to improvement. Perhaps this is why the Bates method is not "proven"; it's too hard to test.
I dropped out of school for that exact reasoning. I am 30 now and am considering suicide because I have no friends, never kissed a girl or had a girlfriend, never been out at night, or to a nightclub, no university (I was an A grade student and parents expected me to go and become a doctor or other high paying job). I lived without glasses for 11 years from 17 to 28. I was isolated and reclusive. I still am. Why did I do it? Why was I so resilient to devote my youth to this? I was being bullied and was becoming social anxious. I though that my myopia may have been the cause of it. And if I was 20/20 then I would feel happier.
I put them back on in June 2012 because I realised it doesn't work. I was close to 30 and it dawned on me my youth was gone. I went to the opticians and they told me my myopia had increased from -2.5 to -4.
RE: I am desperate - satori - 01-12-2014
(01-12-2014, 12:37 AM)jamest Wrote:(12-29-2013, 05:22 PM)Daniel Wrote:(12-29-2013, 01:07 PM)jamest Wrote: If the op is for real, I would say do not try the bates method. It is not proven to work and I think it is terrible advice from Daniel to drop out of school. He will lose his social network and career prospects.
Actually, I suggested home education, which actually works out quite well for some people.
This thread really goes to show that myopia needs to be nipped in the bud. If it progresses even moderately, there could be a lot of practical barriers to improvement. Perhaps this is why the Bates method is not "proven"; it's too hard to test.
I dropped out of school for that exact reasoning. I am 30 now and am considering suicide because I have no friends, never kissed a girl or had a girlfriend, never been out at night, or to a nightclub, no university (I was an A grade student and parents expected me to go and become a doctor or other high paying job). I lived without glasses for 11 years from 17 to 28. I was isolated and reclusive. I still am. Why did I do it? Why was I so resilient to devote my youth to this? I was being bullied and was becoming social anxious. I though that my myopia may have been the cause of it. And if I was 20/20 then I would feel happier.
I put them back on in June 2012 because I realised it doesn't work. I was close to 30 and it dawned on me my youth was gone. I went to the opticians and they told me my myopia had increased from -2.5 to -4.
I am truly sorry for your personal experience, but if it helps you at all, I can speak as someone who has worn glasses and lenses, kissed a girl, had a girlfriend, friends, been to nightclubs, got a degree etc. and I can say without a doubt that devoting my youth to those things did not stop me from being depressed and socially anxious with very low self-esteem.
Indeed, I accept that you do not think it is fair to follow Bates Method because it is not proven. However, by that same logic, how is it fair to blame Bates Method as the sole cause for depression or social anxiety when that is not proven either? It is only your personal experience, just like it is only others' personal experience that Bates Method can work for some people. Science can't comprehend one's own entire lifetime and personal experience.
For the record, I am not sure if Bate's Method can work for me but I do believe it has worked for some people, just as much as I do believe it hasn't worked for you, and just as much as I do believe that it is possible the OP could be telling the truth, mainly because I had similar issues in trying to get people to believe me as a teenager.
But as much as I am sorry for your negative life experiences, which I do not deny happened, I still do think it is unfair to pin everything that is wrong in the universe on Bates Method or this forum simply because you tried it and it didn't work for you. That said, I also accept it may be wiser for some people to not try the method if they have more important priorities in life. It's just, speaking as someone who followed all of the priorities that you listed, I have to say it is not the be all and end all for happiness either.
Out of interest did you have any clear flashes or what you did consider progress during your 11 years?
RE: I am desperate - Daniel - 01-19-2014
(01-12-2014, 12:37 AM)jamest Wrote: never kissed a girl or had a girlfriend, never been out at night, or to a nightclub, no university
Had you done those things, you might have fathered a child you weren't ready for, developed a drinking problem, gotten student loan debt, etc. You could be worse off than you are now.
RE: I am desperate - clarknight - 01-20-2014
(01-19-2014, 11:26 AM)Daniel Wrote:(01-12-2014, 12:37 AM)jamest Wrote: never kissed a girl or had a girlfriend, never been out at night, or to a nightclub, no university
Had you done those things, you might have fathered a child you weren't ready for, developed a drinking problem, gotten student loan debt, etc. You could be worse off than you are now.
Very good point Daniel!
Some of us never realize what we 'are not missing' when we stay home, in school.