Today I woke after a good long deep sleep, meditated, fell back asleep briefly, then slowly opened my eyes to start my day. Everything was so clear! I glanced outside to see all the details of the budding branches on this cloudy morning with no effort, just receiving the clarity. Then the view faded to my usual 20/40-ish blur, which made me sad. It felt like having a glimpse of Heaven, then having the door slammed in my face.
When I walk outside, I usually get a few clear flashes, or I have them while driving (less often than when I’m walking), or sometimes when I just look out the window wanting a break from the computer. However today’s period of increased clarity felt clearer, more vibrant (almost sparkling), and lasted longer than usual, by several seconds. So what did I do right, and how can I repeat this?
Since I’ve been improving my vision and reducing and eventually eliminating my strong glasses, over 15 years now, I’ve been trying to relax to help my progress. (Yes I know that’s an oxymoron, since trying is effort.) This may be why I can’t see the moons of Jupiter with my naked eyes yet. Trying seems to come naturally to me and relaxing does not. And with all I’ve learned about my patterns through regular meditation and EFT practices, maybe I am indeed more relaxed. Which might be why I got that huge gift of super-clarity this morning.
Going forward, I want to keep my focus on relaxing my body and mind, which sometimes seems totally unnatural for me. And I also want to keep gently noticing, not assuming everything will be blurry before I even look. I was just reminded a few hours ago that if I don’t look, I won’t see! And I think with the increased daylight I’ve been getting visually lazy. Since I can see better, I’m not looking for even more.
Fighting and resisting the blur doesn’t work for me. I don’t have the personality type to get angry and want to go to war. I worry and get anxious instead. I’ve been accepting the blur more and more, which goes along with my increased relaxation. This is progress for me. I love feeling calm! And I think I need to challenge the blur a bit now, not just assume it can’t change. My new motto is Explore The Blur! What treasure could be there I haven’t seen before?