Every good teacher knows that the last thing you want to do to an impressionable child is to call him stupid, because he may believe you, then start living to that label. Similarly, I’ve had vision students who proclaimed “I’m blind without my glasses!”, or recently “Seeing is not my gift.”! I usually start my discussion of this topic by saying “Your eyes are listening!”.
When I was growing up, wearing thicker and thicker eyeglasses, my mother often worried aloud about “Nancy’s bad eyes”. I know this came from concern about me, and was not intended as criticism, but I could feel my energy sink every time she said this. My eyes needed a support system back then, or a cheerleader, someone who believed in them and encouraged their ability, and I didn’t have that.
I have other negative memories of people criticizing my eyes’ performance. An early boyfriend regularly called me “El Blind-O”, thinking he was being funny. In 2nd grade the teacher had said I was such an excellent reader, I could work as a proofreader for a publishing company when I grew up. Since I so loved books already, I was thrilled, and ran home to tell my mother. She snapped, “With your eyes, you’d be blind in a month!”. Of course I was crushed, as my eyes and visual centers took one more blow to any remaining confidence they might have had.
As I continue to improve my vision, I can still catch myself thinking “Oh, I won’t be able to see that”, sometimes before I even look! Then I stop for a moment, maybe do some EFT (“tapping”) on being worried I can’t see, then tell myself some optimistic positive facts about my vision. Often, if I’m aware and present, not running on automatic pilot and reflex, I can see pretty well. And the more deeply I relax and let the images come to me instead of grabbing for them, the clearer the view becomes.
Of course telling myself I can see perfectly at all times feels like a lie, because it is! So I focus on statements that are true, like:
I can see everything I need to see.
My eyes are healthy, moist, and alive.
I am so grateful for the abundant colorful riches my vision brings to me.
I am working with my eyes and mind to see in a clearer, more relaxed way.
You get the idea. Think about yourself — do you often gripe about your “bad back”, or even your “messy house”? When you say it, you reinforce it — your words are powerful! Why not use them to encourage something you actually want in your life, instead of just more of the same?
I wore strong glasses, then contact lenses, from age 5 into my 40s. While making many mistakes, eventually l learned how to improve the way I use my eyes and to see in a more relaxed, healthy manner. It is my pleasure to coach others to do the same. Visit me at https://NancyLNeff.com.